What is the best thing to say to two young newlyweds starting a life together?
Well, given that marriage is just about the biggest, scariest and most amazing commitment one can ever make (second to having children, of course), perhaps it would be good for this father of a newly minted bride to share some words of wisdom from people who have been married for years.
1) If you think she's beautiful, tell her.
2) Make dinner together. Eat dinner together. Go to bed together.
3) Your fantasy life should revolve around your wife, not your football team.
4) Life is short. Say "I love you" at least once every day.
5) The more time you spend trying to change your spouse, the less time you have for improving yourself.
6) One of the sexiest things you can do in bed is to serve your spouse a nice breakfast.
7) Talk to each other, not at each other. And really listen.
8) It doesn't matter what you think you're fighting about. It always comes down to a choice between fear and love. Choose wisely.
9) Write this into your wedding vows: "I promise to faithfully replace the toilet paper whenever I use the last of it."
10) Do things together. Do things apart.
11) Career, personal goals and family are important, but nothing is more important than your relationship.
12) The cruelest question you can ask a husband: "Notice anything different?"
13) Be your spouse's biggest cheerleader.
14) If you've truly forgiven your spouse for something, you'll never bring it up again.
15) Your wife doesn't need to know that you think that chick across the street has a great figure. (Not that there's anything wrong with noticing.)
16) Be spontaneously ridiculous and unabashedly silly. Make your spouse laugh. It nourishes your souls.
17) No one person can give you everything you need.
18) If he forgets your anniversary, don't freak out about it. If he forgets your name, do.
19) "What can I do for you, honey?"
20) He's not a mind reader. If you want him to know what you're thinking or feeling, you have to tell him.
21) If you make your kids the center of your universe, there's going to be one massive black hole when they finally grow up and leave.
22) Recognize your spouse's weaknesses, but focus on the strengths.
23) If you always have to win the argument, you'll eventually lose the relationship.
24) Only if she asks: "No, honey, that dress isn't very flattering." (Not "It makes you look fat.")
25) Find someone to talk to about your marriage, but never talk your spouse down to anyone.
26) When you finally realize your spouse is as flawed and messed up as you are, you can leave the rose-colored fantasy behind and start building a real adult relationship.
27) If your wife suddenly starts tanning and exercising a lot, might as well call the lawyer now. (This one came from a recently divorced friend.)
28) Every little disagreement doesn't have to snowball into a discussion about "the relationship."
29) It's actually OK to go to bed angry sometimes, as long as you agree to discuss it in the morning.
30) She's your wife, not your mommy. Go clean up after your own self.